1.03.04

a new year has come...

Hey hey hey! Well I just woke up from a 1/2 hour nap, not much but I'm much more awake now! :D I can't believe Christmas break is almost over. Although I should probably get back into a routine of things, at least when it comes to going to bed and getting up. I've gotten into the habit of going to bed no earlier than 11... (last night it was 12:30) and then sleeping till anywhere between 9 to 10:30. Which is fine but its going to be more difficult now to go back to going to sleep BEFORE 11, and waking up at 6:30.

Well its a new year now! Wow 2004... :O The year I graduate. I remember being little and counting and figuring out that I would graduate high school in 2004 and how far away that seemed! But now its here... and its hard to believe sometimes. Normally I'm not a person that is opposed to change but I'm not sure if I'm ready for this change. Its already begun... scholarship and college applications and essays and open houses...not to mention the extra effort to keep my grades up this year and fight as the teachers call it "senior-itis". I've really got so much to do now, but I keep finding myself getting so overwhelmed that I'm like shutting down and not wanting to do anything. I do need to get myself on the ball though, or I'm going to be in trouble...and not just from my parents but just in trouble in general.

*sigh* well I guess with the New Year one would expect to have some resolutions... well I really haven't made any official ones. Because I make the same ones each year...like "I'm not going to procrastinate", "I'm going to keep my room clean and everything organized", and "I'm not going to fight with my family". But this year I'm not doing that...because in the past, they lasted a month at the most and then it was completely out the window. I guess somethings are just in my personality. I'm probably going to forever be a procrastinator, its just my nature. What I can work on is just getting things done on time, instead of trying to get it done early. And as for keeping my room clean? That never works. Because I'm naturally just not a neat freak. I'd rather spend my time doing other things, instead of cleaning. So I'm just going to try and clean my room once every week, or every other week, so it doesn't get too out of hand. And as for fighting with my family, I know its inevitable so I'm just going to try and work on patience instead. There is a lot of areas that I could use improvement in but I'm just going to try my best, and not worry about it so much. That could be another resolution... just keep being happy! Hehe that should be pretty easy. ;) Some people make that easy to do!!!

As for 2003, I'd have to say so far, that it has been the best year I can think of. I mean of course I've had the usual problems and frustrations along the way, but overall I've been very happy, and that has everything to do with Seth. It was January of last year that his mom relented and he asked me back out. And just the whole year was spent with us getting closer and closer! ;) Yea he is pretty amazing, I don't know what I would do without him. I love him so so much, more than I can say. He's my best friend, always so encouraging and supportive. He can make me smile no matter what mood I'm in, he's a great listener and is always there for me when I need him. He has changed me and my life in so many ways. From the moment we became closer, my whole attitude about myself and about life has changed. He really picked me up as I was trying to get through one of the lowest points in my life. He's brought me closer to God, and he's made me have more confidence in myself and made me believe I'm actually worth something. And its amazing how unconditionally he loves me. Wow, yea I'm so so lucky!!! I could never thank him enough for everything he's done. But I can try! Hehe THANKS SETH!!! I LOVE YOU!!! ;)

Hmm well when I talked to Seth earlier he said he wrote in his journal. (hehe for the first time in like 2 months), so I think I'm going to go read that and um then maybe start on an essay for Marietta College. Well have a good day everyone! And though its a little late... *HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!* TTFN!

~Melissa

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